multidimensional shower art

not that i have time for this... but dang it, so many things have passed through my life recently that i have not taken the time to write about, and therefore share, and have at hand to possibly reflect upon later.

mark of fgf had posted something a few days ago, on some list, that i instantly related to.  but when i clicked on it to comment, the post was gone.  it was something i'd made nearly identical comments about last fall, in a blog post.

then in my usual skipping around in whatever seth books are currently on my nightstand, i keep happening upon further comments relating to the same thing.  even again last night.  last book of early sessions, jane is feeling strange before a session where seth two unexpectedly showed up.  she said she felt like she and rob were future versions of themselves, viewing their current lives as from slightly to the side, or above, or something.  her physical senses were picking up everything much more intensely/acutely than normal, sights sounds colors (this reminded me of tripping).  my blog post was about experiencing this same feeling, of having moments where my consciousness seems to be perceiving my present self from above myself, slightly detached.  and from a much more expansive place.  sometimes wondering if i've already transitioned and just haven't realized it yet.

then in the shower just now, with the warm water cascading around my head and chest, something else happened.  it's so hard to put these things into words, so hard.  i felt/knew myself creating art from this lifetime in/on another level of my own existence.  i sensed/saw/felt/Knew a piece of multidimensional artwork that i myself was creating, at that moment, from pieces of my life here now.  an image of me moving, with changing colors, ages (images from different stages of my life), sounds, but the sound and colors and even the movements were representative of an emotion, a singular emotion from this lifetime that was then displayed as a piece of moving/multidimensional artwork on another level.  i could draw it now, but only in one pose of so many.  and no way could i reproduce the sounds and changing colors. i do know well the emotion.  i Felt myself creating this, Now, but from another level of existence.  and it was haunting, the emotion, the nostalgia for earth, for the kind of sometimes gut-wrenching relationships we create here in our limited perception.  the singular-ness of it, even though it is a shared reality; each experience being a piece of art in itself, from each individual lifetime lived.  this all happened in an instant, as these kinds of experiences do.  it takes much longer to write them up than Have them. and so many times i don't take time out to write them up.

these sorts of moments are somehow linked together, so that knowing one opens up membrances of others.  i think of a covering over all the sky, with holes here and there.  focusing on one hole brings the others into clearer focus, so that i'm then looking at the holes and not the covering.

i suppose soon enough, the covering will dissolve for all of us; and its useful and cool to be here now, focusing on what's experienceable only because there Is a covering over the rest.  the whole thing, earth, relationships with each other, it all seems like one giant piece of art we are doing from a much more expansive place.  like we sent our little selves here like little paintbrushes, sound technicians, video cameras, to create these little nuances of emotion and relation.  i suppose youtube videos are virtual representations, now able to be so easily pieced together from chosen elements.  fine-tuned at will purposefully, to create a certain impression, feeling, or idea.  ha! we are like living youtube vids :)