whole self, physical focus

from february 6, 2010

the whole self that you are uses All experience, and does not judge any of it.
experience, BEing, feeds upon itself. Each choice, each action/physical action taken, spawns another and another and another.
its like the meanderings of an insect underneath the bark of a branch, forming beautiful, intricate little patterns, moving a bit in this direction and a bit in that. the movement creates the pattern.
it is not necessary that you consciously understand the behind-the-scenes workings of the whole self. indeed! then you would Be the whole self (as you Are, but you would be Operating as the whole self). there is purpose in looking just Here, being focused in physical reality, and a necessity for the "walling off" so to speak, of the entirety of the whole self. its like looking through a microscope, you know the rest of the world doesn't go away when your eyes and mind are focused on the slide, but the intense focus allows you to examine closely and experience the "event" going on under the microscope in a way that wouldn't be otherwise possible.

there is purpose in Everything. do not discount any of it.  you may wish to look more closely at precisely the things that you tend to reject. its not that you must choose everything in one moment, but that there is smoother flow in the allowing of it as an equal choice.

it is like shaping the diamond, in real time, continuously. allowing it to morph from one beautiful crystalline structure into another, and another, for infinity. sometimes collapsing down and beginning again.

it is challenging for you to fine-tune your focus in physical reality - you are dispersed, easily and naturally- so the tight focus, maintained long enough to change/become/Be what you in one moment feel you wish to adhere to, becomes difficult when in the next moment, a different angle of your brilliance comes into view, but you are yet attempting to focus on the previous vision. holding one vision long enough for it to come to fruition is on the one hand frustrating for you, but on the other, immensely rewarding when it happens, as in when you passed your board exams, having endured two years of massage school and all the difficulties of studying for and passing the tests.